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    • Home
    • 1 COMMUNICATION STYLES
    • 2 ATTENTION AND LISTENING
    • 3 ASKING QUESTIONS
    • 4 MANAGING IMPACT
    • 5 INSPIRED MEETINGS
    • RESOURCES
  • Home
  • 1 COMMUNICATION STYLES
  • 2 ATTENTION AND LISTENING
  • 3 ASKING QUESTIONS
  • 4 MANAGING IMPACT
  • 5 INSPIRED MEETINGS
  • RESOURCES

Learn: Communication styles

Let's start by looking at the different ways we can communicate, depending on the purpose of the interaction.


Take a look at this communication styles model, based on work by David W Angel.

The four styles

This model has two dimensions. One is the direction of flow: one-way or two-way. The other is about being collaborative or competitive. These two dimensions create the four communication styles shown on this diagram. Bear in mind that many conversations use a combination of these styles. None of them are right or wrong, but problems can arise when two people engage in conversation using different styles.


Read more about each style below:

Education

Conversation

Conversation

The Education style is collaborative and one-way.


It is an intention to share information for the sake of teaching or informing others. Normally, one person delivers information to one or more people.


This could happen in a meeting, a classroom setting, or it could be through a white paper, newsletter or some other form of single directional flow of information. It could also be a 1-1 conversation where one person is training another in a particular skill or technique.


In this 1-way conversation, there's still an intention to support and help - the people are on the same side


For example:

A mentor or subject matter expert shares information with colleagues who primarily listen.

Conversation

Conversation

Conversation

The Conversation style is collaborative and two-way.


It is a dialogue. It happens when people are curious, listening, sharing ideas, building on others’ ideas and generating something new with a spirit of collaboration.


There might be a feeling of debate at times, but it is in service of understanding differing viewpoints, perhaps even wrestling with ideas for the sake of common understanding and creating a robust common view or output together.


For example:

Multiple project team members actively exchange information back and forth with one another.

Debate

Assertion

Assertion

The Debate style is competitive and two-way.


It is a win-lose situation. People share thoughts in order to win.


Multiple people may be involved in the conversation and there may be information shared from multiple perspectives, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that it penetrates others’ minds or changes opinions. If everyone is in a competitive mind-set then they all think they are right.


For example:

Adversaries express opinions; they listen only for the opportunity to rebut or challenge; points of view do not change.

Assertion

Assertion

Assertion

 The Assertion style is competitive and one-way.


It is when one person, or a representative of a group, expresses views that are often stated in opposition to the audience. This might be to propose a new way or convince others about a particular viewpoint.


There is no room for dialogue and the mindset is competitive.


For example:

One person firmly states an opinion and is not open to hearing others’ views.

Your brain and communication styles

A collaborative style will generally be more productive in the workplace, particularly when you are working in a project team or having development conversations. As people collaborate well, they will likely experience dopamine and/or oxytocin.


However, the limbic system can lead to a competitive communication style, especially when it's in threat mode. This is because it has a tendency to be attached to ideas, it needs to be right and it doesn't want evidence to the contrary.


A mismatch of styles may create a threat to expectations, causing frustration or annoyance.


So to stay in a collaborative style, you need to proactively keep your PFC active and managing your limbic system.

Reflect on a recent conversation

Bring to mind a recent conversation that didn't go as well as you had hoped.

Take a moment to reflect on that conversation and write down what you think was at play.


Which communication style were you each using?

Did differences in style contribute to your disappointment with the interaction?

Next time, how could you make sure you are both communicating in the same style?

Next: What drives your communication

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